hiatus |hīˈātəs| noun ( pl. -tuses ) [usu. in sing. ] a pause or gap in a sequence, series, or process ORIGIN mid 16th cent. (originally denoting a physical gap or opening): from Latin, literally ‘gaping,’ from hiare ‘gape.’
It's much to my dismay that I write this post, but as the Japanese like to say: it cannot be helped! しょうがない (shouganai). Due to an impending visit from my Mother - her first time in Japan! - and all the other aforementioned extra work I'm in the middle of: 6 day work-weeks, a weekly morning kindergarten shift topped with a normal until 10pm shift and some business overtime classes, not to mention how I tend to use my free time studying Japanese as much as is reasonably possibly, I can't expect myself to keep up the blog this month. Better to out and say then leave the loyal devotees refreshing the page every couple of days.
There is reprieve for me however; a few days before the week of Spring holidays, properly designated "Golden Week," my Mother will arrive on this fair island. Which means traveling once again across the landscape of Japan, to Hiroshima, Kyoto, Nagoya and beyond. It'll be my first time taking the world-famous bullet train as well, which should be interesting! (I did the sketchy but cheap nightbus last time..... NEVER AGAIN)
I will make quick mention however that I've also decided, after a year and a half in my current location of sunny Tobu-Nerima (a suburb on the north-western end of Tokyo, near adjoining Saitama prefecture), I will most likely be moving within the next 2 months. For the sake of being closer to my work, a bigger apartment, my own private bathroom, and a change of pace. That may also clog things up a bit on the blog-front. I am however quite excited at the prospect of it all! If only I wasn't such a packrat, and didn't insist on keeping all these books, the dresser, the kitchenette, the fairly new acoustic guitar, the 4-foot disco lamp, the persian rugs, the gold-seated toilet... well it would be a much easier task. However I'm possibly going to get a friend to rent a car and help me move, which should help ease the financial burden and also provide fodder for an interesting future blog post.
Another year contract has been signed with my current employer, who I am happy to say I'm quite happy with. It's not every man who can say he has any level of satisfaction with his job. Recently I've pondered getting a Masters in TESL (Teaching English as a Second Language) and possibly going career with it. It's not so limiting as it might seem; not only would I be more apt to get higher paying (not to mention more dignified) jobs in various other countries, Asian or European, but perhaps I could use it as a vehicle for experience. That is how I have seen my current position for quite some time, and I'm sure many others do as well. A vehicle for experience. You get paid to do a job which can be (although it certainly isn't always) fun and rewarding, and get to live in a foreign country and rack massive personal experience points.
Case in point: yesterday I went to Asakusa for the first time. An amazing place with tons of "the oldest _____ in Japan" going on - including the oldest chronologically numbered block,* something like １丁目１番１, which if you can't see it on your computer or read Japanese basically says: "1 city block of 1 numbered 1." Anyhow, the point is this kind of job drives the experience train. There's no predictable end to the need of English education in foreign countries. In a way, I could see the world and get paid to do so. Hmm hmmm hmmm. I'd also like to imagine racking up massive language fluency as well, but realistically I don't think I'll ever consider anything besides Japanese my second language, although I'd like to attain passable Mandarin Chinese. Really I would. "One language at a time Ben!" Another teacher once told me... *all blocks in Japan are sorted and number chronologically or clockwise around a center block, and there are no street names save for major roads. Sound confusing? It is. Read more here.
This has really all been a cleverly-disguised ploy to put off an eagerly awaiting virtual flashcard deck of 100 cards. Curse this mortal coil and faulty memory of mine!!
Thanks for reading. Until May folks!!
-Ben
P.S. Popular Japanese blog Hello Damage has posted some pictures from the latest F.I.D. show, in case you want to see cute Japanese ladies, dudes in messed up costumes (NSFW - NOT SAFE FOR WORK) or the funny faces I make when I play guitar. Thanks Steve!
You know those days where every little thing goes wrong? Well I had one today, and here's a breakdown because who doesn't love a little e-angst? I mean, in a society where it's expected to repress all true feeling and not show your emotions, where else am I going to vent? And will I ever stop asking rhetorical questions?
I'll back up to soften my emo-blow here (because complaining about anything is "emo" nowadays, and I should just wear a smile of dumb happiness like I do at work all the time? Forget that). Yesterday was a good day, and it contained what may have been one of my best classes of all time. I had a student whom I felt very comfortable talking to - her level was quite high and I'd had her before. She is one of a non-rare breed of students who teaches English to kids but can always use extra help from a native speaker. Somehow I got on to the subject of exercise, and explained that until a few years ago I had really been a regular slob with bad eating habits and no real motivation to better myself. Due to events I chose to omit for obvious reasons (but will go into more in the future, such as my late brother Bruce and the impending realities of adulthood), I gave her my success story as humbly as I could; But I'm not going to lie, I did feel good talking about it. I could never imagine going back to the way I was before, I'm a lot more happy with myself nowadays.
Anyhow, she says to me: "Wow, you have such a strong will." And me, cynic/realist me says to her that pretty much any kind of life change is possible if you want it badly enough - you can do what you put your mind too. After this I could tell she was hesitant about something so I pressed her a bit, and she revealed to me that she has been taking a Beginner-level correspondence course for learning medical English (such as Orthodontist or Pediatrician), but it had become quite daunting and when the course was up in February, she was thinking of throwing in the towel. I told her she should stick with it and that it's really a totally doable goal, the real key to it lies in learning some of the basic Latin roots to make sense out of the words. The real kicker though is that she seemed downright touched by my encouraging words, and told me that when she told other teachers about learning medical English they just said things like: "Why?" or "That's way too hard." I find this kind of negative nancy attitude in the workplace - yes, I taught her that too - to be seriously depressing and downright offensive toward my job as a whole. Yes it's a conversational school and not a psychiatric ward, but to be so discouraging of a student with lofty goals is just pathetic. It comes across me as the equivalent of: "oh my life sucks, you're doing something worthwile? You suck, you can't do that." I told her she pays for the lesson and should have the right to talk about whatever she wants. At the end of 40 minutes she said: "It's over already?" I don't think I've ever gotten such a nice response before.
But enough with the positive shtick - if only every student had heart and ambitions like that - or at the very least wasn't a total robot. Yes, the collectivist Japanese attitude and the hoards of "empty shells" (as another teacher so succinctly put it) is starting to get to me. If your biggest hobby is shopping, I don't know why you're wasting our oxygen with your existence. If JPOP is the only kind of music you listen to, you probably care more about what's cool to like then what is actually anything close to good, passionate music. If you want to be in a conversation class, at least pretend that your life is more interesting than watching every episode of The View back to back while trapped in a small room with a ping pong paddle, two sticks and a dustbin.
So.
Last night I was enjoying a quiet evening at home, drinking some beers and watching Clint Eastwood's new flick "Gran Torino." It might be the best thing I've ever seen him do since the 70s. I had a some amount of beer which caused me to be a little sluggish the next morning. Fair enough. It seems every Thursday, basically my last real "workout day" of the week, I'm hurting and have trouble motivating myself. I usually sleep in copiously and by the time I get out of bed, get to the gym and finish up, I have something like an hour to go home, make a lunch, get my stuff together, change and walk back to the train station to catch the train on time for work. And yes, I realize I only do this to myself with my erroneous scheduling.
And to top it off there's this dude named Sakao who speaks fluent English and works at the gym.
Oh, Sakao. Who said the road to hell was paved with good intentions? Well they were right. I talked to this dude one time, and now whenever he sees me he's smiling, waving and asking me how I am and what I think of this or that as an American. I mean, I respect the man and his curiosity and all but it's a bit annoying when you have a set schedule to adhere to and are trying to exercise. I'm nice about it though - and it is cool to have someone talking to me and not giving one of 3 token responses: 1) bowing and saying "Otsukaresama desssu" (you must be tired after working so hard), this obviously being from the staff only. What kills me is when they say it before I've even started - I'M NOT TIRED YET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111 Just one of those phrases that has lost all literal meaning. I also hear it in echos and droves at work. And in my sleep.
Anyway. Token response toward foreigner Ben #2: Look away or ignore. I don't mind this one so much, I go to the gym to do what I do and leave, not to socialize. Though maybe I feel like an unloved gorilla in a bad zoo exhibit sometimes. Response #3: Probably the least common but it still happens, the occasional "WTF" stare, or curious stare, or unknowing stare, however you want to interpret it. I'm used to this so it doesn't bother me much anymore.
What was I talking about again? Oh right, Sakao. So today we were talking about the recent Obama inauguration, a real hot topic over here at the moment. (Obama is like a superstar in Japan right now: black, cool AND relavent!) He asks me if I think things will turn around and I gave him my honest opinion: I think that it will all take more time than the fickle American people want to admit. People have built up Obama like a second coming of Christ, and while he's a great speech writer and his rhetoric is awe-inspiring, his Presidential "change" really has yet to be seen. It's going to take more than 2 months of Obama to turn around the economical trends that have been decades in the making - more than 2 years even. I think that realistically Obama could be a great President and still things could be in the shittier when he leaves office. Consumer confidence only can be pushed so far by one man, powerful and representative of the C-word as he may be. I also made some comparisons between Taro Aso, the current Japanese Prime Minister, and Bush, and Sakao noted how even though Aso entered the position something like a year ago, his approval rating went from a then-60% to a now less than-20%. The masses truly are fickle and impossible to please.
So I said something along those lines. The dude has a pretty good vocabulary and said he was impressed that my expectations seemed so realistic. He said in fact that most Americans he had talked to have shared my passive enthusiasm and hopes for the future. I told him I thought that was not representative of how America actually is - it's a mass of people undereducated in politics who vote more like they're voting in a High School popularity contest, on appearance and charisma alone. I said that I think maybe the more knowledgeable Americans (or at least those in college or with a BA like me) just had the notion that getting the !#$% out of dodge for a few years wouldn't be a bad idea right now.
Wow, hell of a rant. So when I left the gym, my day slowly began to slip into the crapper. It had been drizzling all night and would be all day, so the weather was cold and miserable. Getting back I found what I thought to a totally unnecessary new sign JUST put into my guest house in Japanese and English: "Please take off your shoes AT THE DOOR!!" I do this anyway even though it's a royal pain, and everyone and their mother knows about this particular cultural aspect! We're in Japan for pete's sake, why the need for a sign, especially a bilingual one?!
I realized as soon as I walked into my apartment that I had a stack of dishes and wouldn't be able to make my token eggs and sausage breakfast - in fact I was out of sausage and the green peppers I usually put into my omelettes all went bad overnight somehow. So I went with just eggs which was OK, but the real kicker was when I realized that I had no clean suit in my apartment! I had worn a fairly scummy suit Tuesday because I had failed to drop clothes off at the Dry Cleaners in time. That was no biggie. Then on Wednesday I found out that the place is closed every Wednesday, so another day in the scumsuit. Yuck. Today being Thursday, despite the lack of time I had no choice but to haul ass over to the dry cleaners (a 4 minute walk) and get my suits. I did and came back. Finished washing my dishes since I thought I had time. Put on a freshly laundered pair of pants and, low and behold, there's a tear in them in the same @#$%ing spot above the pocket that there was a month ago when I paid those people to fix it. Curses! So I got ready quickly and hauled ass once again with only about 2 minutes of extra time to drop off my damaged goods at the "High Speed Eagle," as it's called, followed by me not understanding some Japanese and going like "HUH just let me pay for the freakin pants" and finally realizing that it was free of charge, most likely because they had fixed it before. I thanked them and made a mad dash to the train with about a minute to spare.
!o_o!
Two uneventful train-rides later I was on my way to school, but the weather and everything else had just tired me out and made me feel like anything but "teaching." I also realized around this time I had forgotten, for the first time in veritable months, to pack a lunch. That delicious and healthy sandwich on whole wheat bread, one of the awesomest parts of my shift would not be partaken today. I sighed and thought hey, no problem, I'll just go to that cheap rotating-sushi restaurant instead! This pepped me up a bit.
The damn place was closed for repairs.
I ate a Wendy's double cheese instead - not too bad and almost identical to the American equivalent, except perhaps for the sesame seeds on the bacon. I went to work, clocked in and wanted to dropkick a baby seal when I read the note attached to my timecard. It was news about my sub duty on Saturday, and this bears some explanation: Usually I get sent to a random school to hang around and help out where I can, and don't have to substitute-teach anybodies actual shift on Saturdays. I really don't mind sub shifts at all, it's just that they tend to start a good 2 hours earlier, and considering my schedule of 3:30-9:30 on weekdays, 10:15-4:15 on Saturday is no fun at all, especially when the school is a good hour away. The last 2 weeks I've been subbing for this Aussie who is out on a long vacation - fair enough. I had a trainwreck of a class the first time teaching those wacky 3 year-olds, as mentioned a few posts back, but the second time went pretty good. In fact I even had a 1 on 1 model lesson with a 3 year old girl that day which was super fun. Regardless, turns out the Aussie is for whatever reason calling in sick and most likely just extending his vacation. I did not expect to have to teach 3 year olds so early in the damned morning again so freakin soon, and am just not looking forward to it. I'm going to Ian's for a quick dinner (before my unfortunate last-trains come all to soon) Friday night after work which will involve me getting home late, then Saturday is an early day AND I have a birthday party I'm supposed to attend Saturday night. Should be an interesting weekend.
Back to my day though, since you're all dying of suspense here. I also found out my first student was one who made me feel really uncomfortable by hitting herself in the back of the head when she made mistakes and I corrected her a few months back - I dreaded having her again and today of all days, I did. It wasn't so bad in the end, I picked an easy lesson and was as lenient, babying and encouraging as I could be to a 50-odd year old owman, but I swear if she only ever actually studied outside a biweekly 40 minute session she might actually learn something. Such is the case with many of the (often annoying) hobbyists who frequent our schools: Their attitude is more like "Oh my god! I get to talk to a foreigner" than "I really want to learn to speak a foreign language." I now totally understand all the monkey-in-a-suit comparisons that come from jaded English teachers who rant on the net like I have succumb to doing right now: We are objects of entertainment for many, and that is what keeps the English Conversation School business alive and kicking. It's really a zoo out there...
It puts food in my stomach anyway. Oh and the aforementioned self-mutilator student only hit herself twice, relatively lightly, so I'd call that a success? The rest of the day I felt like crud, and I had one good class which involved brutal stories of double-bike riding accidents and intense sunburns, but the others were just forced and dull conversation about things I didn't care about. I felt tired, somewhat cranky and not like teaching, just one of those days. The funniest thing that happened all day was at the end, when me and 3 of my female colleagues were debating stairs vs. elevator - they said stairs and for whatever reason I said something like "OK FATTIES LETS START BURNING CALORIES" and the few students waiting by the elevators thought it was hysterical while I waved an authoritative fist and Kate jogged in place. Oh, the exciting life I lead.
I know that now I'm writing in kind of a sour mood, and the events of today really weren't all that bad. I'll look back and think: "wow what were you so annoyed or upset about?" But I've come to find that this retrospective unacceptance is self-defeating, as I've literally destroyed old journals, poetry and even music I felt ashamed that I had created, and now of course I deeply regret it. (As a certain old pal would never let me forget, I did DJ SPINJAM in my basement when I was 12-14, before I ever had a real band - god would those tracks be great for a laugh right now) So in conclusion I'm telling it like it is, the way I wanna tell it, cuz it's my blog so SUCK IT. At least I don't do those annoying vlogs (video-blogs) where I talk to myself for hours and expect people to be so bereft of any kind of social interaction or worthwhile hobby that they would actually listen - that's just weird.
P.S. Due to hanging my umbrella off my work bag and forgetting about it, then subsequently thrusting my bag up onto the rack above the seats after entering the train, I almost impaled/definitely splashed some residual water on two different poor and unsuspecting Japanese women today, both before and after work. I felt like such an ass.
"First thing I remember was asking papa, why, For there were many things I didn't know. And daddy always smiled and took me by the hand, Saying, someday you'll understand. Well, I'm here to tell you now, each and every mother's son, That you better learn it fast, you better learn it young, 'Cause someday never comes." - Creedence Clearwater Revival
"Round and round and round we spin to weave a wall to hold us in it won't be long. How slow and slow and slow it goes to mend the tear that always shows it won't be long." - Neil Young and Crazy Horse
"Yea I'm fine everything's great. I lost my job cuz I was five minutes fuckin late!" - Cutthroat.
A simulation of conversations I have had with approximately 234535624 people:
"Oh yea, well, I can't do X because I'm moving soon"
"Oh, where are you moving to, Cohoes, Albany?"
"Japan."
(gasp of surprise)
"Really? Do you know Japanese?"
"I took it for 2 years in college as a minor, so I can ask the important questions and get around painlessly enough. But there's a lot I still don't know."
"Why are you moving?"
"To teach English. The market is much better in Japan than over here, since you can actually TEACH with just a Bachelors, and usually make more money than you would teaching in public schools. So, more money, less college loans. Although South Korea pays more..."
"How are you going to teach without knowing Japanese?"
"Well, almost all "Eikaiwa schools (英会話の学), or English Conversational schools, don't want you speaking any Japanese at all. The reason being that Japanese people have a grasp on the English language, but schools only focus on writing and reading, primarily. So Eikaiwa schools exist to augment people who want to increase their English language knowledge for whatever reason. The point being that-"
(by this time usually the person is either pretending to still be interested or making obvious signs of boredom)
"they just need direction and positive reinforcement on proper pronunciation, grammar and word usage. Now teaching children is different, and rather intimidating in my opinion, since you have to keep kids attention and make everything look like a game. Even more extreme is if they are total novices, you basically just play an intense game of charades, trying to get them to associate an English word with some sort of action."
(at this point I hang my arms like a primate, say "oo oo aa aa" and scratch my head while lumbering around, and if the person is still paying attention, they laugh and get the idea)
--
This concludes the beginning of my blog, a triple-post on my one day off since I work 60 hours a week right now to try and save money (a recommended $3,000 in moving and initial living expenses, in fact) for the big move. Sayonnora!
Hello world. My name is Benjamin Belcher, but you can call me Ben. There are those of you that know me, and those that don't. However, I invite anyone and everyone to check out this blog if they so desire to. I'm only giving a heavily truncated version of my life thus far in this post, merely a few important things you need to know about me and the purpose of this blog.
Still with me? Cool.
I am 23, a recent English major graduate from SUNY Albany, and I leave in 43 days for Tokyo (prefecture to be announced) to become an English teacher. I'm going to keep this blog as far away from my job as possible. The focus here is to record my adventures in a foreign land roughly 6700 miles from home. I've lived in Upstate New York all my life, and as much as I love the places and the people, it's time for a change. For better or for worse, this blog will record my ups and downs, trials and tribulations, mishaps and culture gaps, with fun pictures of my travels and a personal record of how I felt along the way. Primarily this blog is for me, but as it is 100% public it's also for the enjoyment of friends and strangers alike, so that you might get a glimpse into my life, and understand what it is like for a 6'1" white caucasian male to move to Japan. It's all been said or done before, but not my way.
What this blog is not:
This blog isn't a place for me to cry for attention. It's not a list of whiny complaints (at least not most of the time, I promise you) about how much I miss home or can't stand crowded trains or miss Snyder's Pretzels™. It's not a place for me to complain about my job, because quite frankly, you don't shit where you eat. A reputable company has chosen to employ me, and the least I can do is separate business and recreation. This blog is admittedly amateur, but I will do my best as an anally retentive English obsessee to keep it grammatically correct, well-written and quite simply enjoyable to read. I've been reading and writing a long time, so I promise you all my best on this.
Now that we have long-winded introductions done with, welcome. Enjoy your stay in my slice of cyberspace. Updates may be sparse at first as I am preparing for my move (more details on this and all its crazy facets later), and also when I first move as setting up internet can be a timely process, from what I understand of other peoples' accounts.
While this is a "live" blog, updated regularly, I consider it to be an unfolding story as well. I will therefore be sorting out the events here in rough chunks of time labeled as "chapters," with a prologue beginning in New York. I will list here the current "chapter" of this chunk of my life story, which I have decided to share with anyone and everyone on the internet.
